When the Cups do not runneth over
Unpacking a middling US Davis Cup tie, the lopsided Laver Cup, and Taylor Townsend's offenses. Plus, love for João and loathing for Brooks Nader.
Since the US Open rush, I’ve been recovering from a not-so-fun surgery that’s left me in a lot of pain and less patience than normal for watching tennis overnight. I’m trying to remember how I watched the Asian Swing last year because I know I did, but I’m starting to suspect it was largely via replays. As full-fledged as my tennis obsession has become, sleep is one of the few non-negotiables in my life that the sport already has me negotiating a tad too much.
As a result, today’s issue is going to be a bit of a grab bag with a bias for my timezone (although I love when players are in Europe most—watching in the early morning is much preferred to staying up late, even if it seems to magically absolve me of all other AM responsibilities).
The Replay
There’s no “USA” in team (events)
Welp, it was a pretty tragic Davis Cup for the USA and despite my complete lack of patriotism (especially right now) it still bummed me out. With both Ben Shelton and Tommy Paul recovering from injuries, Taylor Fritz was essentially left to pick up the pieces while fighting an upper respiratory illness. I almost believed he would pull it off until I remembered that he’s had a bad case of the yips for “holding serve in big moments” ever since he got off grass. As a card-carrying member of the Fritz fan club, I’m well-versed in the suffering that comes with rooting for the No. 1 American but it’s getting a little too repetitive. I genuinely believe (don’t unsubscribe) that if he wasn’t so in his head he could’ve beaten the Djokovic that showed up in the quarterfinals and he certainly wouldn’t have so easily handed Jiri Lehecka what was ultimately the defining win at Davis Cup but alas, his head won (and lost him both matches). I’m not sure if he needs a sports psychologist or to lock himself in a room playing League of Legends for a week, but someone needs to break down the scar tissue that’s forming.
Speaking of tough-to-watch Americans, it’s safe to say that Frances Tiafoe is in a rut. After his early US Open exit, he pulled out of Laver Cup without explanation and then proceeded to lose two rough matches at Davis Cup, winning only 10 games total. When Foe’s cohort of American players first broke on the scene, he was expected by many to have the most success, but things obviously haven’t panned out that way. I’ve wondered for a while if his inability to consistently break into the top 10, win a 500 or 1000, and thus receive the same accolades as the likes of Shelton and Fritz weighs on him and I think the answer is: how could it not? These guys are competitors and as they get older, it’s only human that they’d reflect on the expectations they haven’t yet met.
I also think Tiafoe’s been a bit cursed by his fame outpacing his actual tennis success. More people know who Frances Tiafoe is than they do Taylor Fritz, and he probably still sells more tickets than the introverted Californian. That kind of crowd love is a thrill, but, like cotton candy, it’s easy to gorge on until you inevitably realize it’s not true sustenance. To be clear, it’s not Foe’s fault he’s so beloved but it’s been said by those in his own inner circle that the outside noise can be a distraction for him at times. I don’t know what the prescription is here, do you? Tell me in the comments.
Despite the loss, I did love Shelton and Paul showing up to root for their team. Shelton brings the same energy to the sidelines that he does to hyping himself up on court and, frankly, I’d like to hire him to cheer me on in big moments. Paul, meanwhile, showed up in the ugliest patriotic t-shirt I’ve ever seen and covertly drank a beer, which is exactly what I would expect him to do. Our guys might be losers, but I fear they continue to win over my big dumb heart.
PS. You know who is winning actual matches? The American women, of course.
A lopsided Laver Cup
I don’t care if it’s an exhibition, I love Laver Cup. I mean when Roger Federer is the quasi Creative Director, it’s bound to have some appeal. But this year’s teams are so lopsided that the result already feels written, removing any intrigue and a lot of the good vibes the event is known for.
Part of this is due to the American guys being down for the count, but it’s also because most of the top players right now are from…Europe. How do you balance the teams in a way that actually makes this event fun if Team World is so limited in who it can choose? And how is any event balanced when one team has Alcaraz, the world No. 1, and the other team doesn’t have a single soul who can beat him?
Until someone not-from-Europe comes along as a true challenger to the top two players, the event is going to lose some of its appeal. Could it be João Fonseca? The poor kid has been hyped to the gills (and resented for it) since he won his first title at the Argentina Open, but—despite always liking him—I’m just now starting to see the vision. The match he played against Flavio Cobolli last night has to be one of his best performances yet (statisticians, weigh in) and he’s only NINETEEN. Once he learns to play with more controlled power and gets quicker on his feet (which could happen very fast), I think we may have a real contender on our hands.
Nevertheless, while I love to engage in tennis magical thinking, I just don’t see Team World pulling off an upset here — even if their grab-bag of a team still has way better vibes (Team Europe really gives the least on the bench, and their coaches Yannick Noah and Tim Henman seem half-present compared to the deeply invested Team World coaches Andre Agassi and Pat Rafter). Maybe by assuming the worst, the world (literally) will surprise me? A girl can dream.
Off-Court
Taylor Townsend depletes her good will
If you’re not chronically online with an algorithm focused entirely on tennis, then you may have missed Taylor Townsend making offensive comments about Chinese culture while in Shenzhen for the Billie Jean King Cup. In a moment of incredible irony, Townsend—who was just on the receiving end of racist comments from Jelena Ostapenko at the US Open—somehow thought it was a good idea to post multiple Instagram stories about how “crazy” and “wild” Chinese food (including turtle and bullfrog) is and that she couldn’t believe “these people” eat like this. She went so far as to joke that she’d need to talk to HR about being offered this food and rated it a “2 out of 10.” Her overall tone was not just truly unfunny, but embarrassingly ill-informed and dehumanizing. It was such a cliche of “American goes overseas,” made more painful by the fact that tennis players are so well-traveled and, you’d hope, pretty worldly. After it blew up online, the crowds in Shenzhen responded by booing her on court and holding signs that said things like "Taylor, eat more bullfrogs then you'll play better.”
She posted what I would describe as a pretty weak apology the next day, in which she seemed more sorry to the USTA for embarrassing them than she did to the Chinese people (and tournament hosts) she offended. Unfortunately, the whole situation also gave many internet trolls who were chomping at the bit to prove that Ostapenko was right when she called Townsend “uneducated” a lot of fuel. Math has never been my strong suit but I’m pretty sure that offensive behavior from one person doesn’t get canceled out just because their target is also capable of being offensive.
Reality TV star clings to her fake Challengers moment
I have learned way too much about Brooks Nader over the last few weeks, so much so that I deigned to watch her new reality show Love Thy Nader. For the uninitiated, Nader—a Kardashian wannabe famous for being a Sports Illustrated model and Dancing With the Stars contestant—has been running to any publication that will listen to hint that she was two-timing Jannik Sinner and Carlos Alcaraz and is now just dating the latter. She’s dragged this bit out so long that it’s far past its expiration date, and yet just this week she went on Watch What Happens Live to couch it in pseudo-feminist terms, saying, “Guys do it all the time.”
Girly, no one’s upset at the idea of you having a roster, it’s just weird that you’re flat out lying. I have it on good authority that Jannik Sinner is dating model Laila Hasanovic and has been for a while. Deuxmoi (who knows so much about tennis that she pronounces Jannik with a hard J, like Jan [Brady] - nick) is insistent that during and after Wimbledon Nadler was seeing both men, a feat which, even if I didn’t know the truth, would make no sense for two reasons: one, Hasanovic was there with Sinner and two, do you think that Jannik f*cking Sinner (who is the definition of married-to-the-game) is spending his time off-court sneaking random chicks in and out of hotel rooms? No, he’s eat-sleep-breathing tennis.
Fear not, this newsletter is not going to turn into Deucemoi™ but I had to shut down this bullshit narrative that not even Kimmy K would milk so hard.
Kitted (On Speed)
I’m sitting on a few longer fashion stories that’ll come out in the next few weeks, but here are a few quick updates in case you missed them:
Coco Gauff is a full-blown Miu Miu girl now, starring in a campaign for their new perfume Miutine alongside It girls Chloë Sevigny and Paloma Elsesser. I’m glad that the brand is extending their partnership with her into other realms, it’s one of the few tennis-luxury collabs that actually makes sense right now.
The tennis fashion covers keep coming, with new features on Jannik Sinner, Vicky Mboko, and Coleman Wong (leading the pack with two in one week). The styling leaves a lot to be desired but we’ll keep wishing and hoping for something memorable.
He hit ‘em with the ‘ol Fritz dissociating pre-match smile. BOSS is basically the ATP Tour’s in-house atelier at this point. On top of dressing Taylor Fritz and Matteo Berrettini on and off court, they styled all the guys for Laver Cup and dressed Denis Shapovalov for his recent wedding to Mirjam Bjorklund (word on the street, though, is that his Canadian peer Felix Auger-Aliassime will be wearing Dior for his own upcoming walk down the aisle).
I was just as confused as Daniel-Yaw Miller that On selected the Nigerian Afrobeats star Burna Boy to be an ambassador for its tennis category (dubbing him the “Clubhouse President”) but his analysis convinced me that maybe it’s not crazy? I guess we’ll see.
Thanks for reading! If you have tennis news or tips to share, email jessica@hard-court.com.
Revisiting 1980’s Agassi cheered me up 🕺
Wonder if court jorts will ever make a comeback?
https://www.instagram.com/p/DLvNGCtOwn4/?img_index=3
As you yourself said it’s an exhibition with nothing at stake. I really think it’s run its course.
While Townsend’s comments don’t cancel out Alona’s comments it does show she wasn’t wrong because Townsend’s comments were pretty ignorant. Be that as it may, it shows two things: westerners (some but not all) criticize food or cultures they don’t understand instead of trying to just accept that it’s different than what they’re used to; and secondly, does every feeling have to lead to a video? I think not. Some things are better kept to yourself.